So, it’s been a couple of weeks since I last wrote a blog so I thought I better get on with it and give you all an update.
I still haven’t heard anything from my GP or specialist regarding the next stages. To be honest I could really do with starting some sort of hormone therapy, as some days I am completely wiped and have no energy at all, other days it is like nothing has happened. This can be quite difficult to live with actually because it is unpredictable. I have though started taking some natural remedies such as evening primrose oil, starflower oil and ‘menopace’ original which is full of vitamins. These were recommended by a lovely lady I got to college with and they work! Well, for me they do anyway and I definitely recommend trying them.
I just want to say thank you to you all. I have had some lovely messages and conversations with people about the Facebook page (justovaryacting) and just generally about what I am going through. Yesterday I received a message from a 22 year old who is going through the same thing. She was grateful to have come across my page to restore some of that positivity, that when told something like this can become very negative. And this is the reason I do what I do. Also, thank you for all the continued support and likes, please do keep sharing the page and raising awareness.
This week I have been signed off from work. My GP has been trying to persuade me to take some time off for ages but as usual I carried on and soldiered through. However, this week I felt differently about it, I felt that I had to take some time off, some time away just to process things and rest. Rest….. I don’t even know what that is, I do not rest easy.
So, it is near the end of the week and I have decided to go back to work earlier than planned as I simply cannot afford the time off. This is a disappointing reality for most people who are employed, because statutory sick pay is comical! How can anyone who genuinely unwell and in need of time off afford to live on £80 per week? It’s such a shame.
Anyway, I have handed in my notice where I currently work because I quite frankly want to live my life. I have decided to work around my life, rather than live around work. So all of the activities I enjoy doing weekly that I have half heartedly committed to due to working hours, I am going to be enjoying every week. These are the things that make me happy so why have I denied myself all this time? I am also only going to seek jobs that give me job satisfaction. And now I am going to live my life putting myself first and to be honest continue to be brave yet humble.
I have done some brave things in my life. Sought medical help for embarrassing issues, shared my story of early menopause to the world, told someone how I felt about them knowing full well nothing could be done about it, deal with bereavements, moved to New York on my own and just generally fight life challenges that get thrown my way. If you too are a fighter, then good on you. Be proud, I know I am.
Finally, it is fair to say that I am making changes and this is thanks to ‘the change’. It may be hard to understand but whatever life throws at you, how ever big or small, however good or bad, embrace it! Use it to turn your life around. In fact just do it anyway. Stop wasting time, stop worrying, stop believing in what if’s and start to believe in yourself.
You only get what you settle for……
Difficult roads often lead to beautiful destinations……